We do school at the dining room table, see the huge stack of school books lol You can also see Samuel's *artwork* on the table's legs lol Chad made these benches recently, the children had pretty much destroyed all of the chairs that went with the table. Hoping these benches hold up a little better : D
Samuel and Ava , early one morning, working on a 50cent art project I got them at Joanns.
This week has been hard, I am not quite sure why. We are into our 3rd week of home schooling. It always takes a little while to get used to the new routine. I just feel like school is the only thing I can get accomplished some days. I think I was expecting everything to be a lot easier this year because Parker and Sydney are now in school. And it is easier, I don't even want to think about how hard it would be if I had to teach them as well. It is just that I didn't expect to struggle and I am. Also, I feel like my new holistic approach to my health stopped working. I think I have figured it out though. One of the things my doctor did was to put me on natural progesterone cream. Well, I have to use it for 3 weeks and then take a week off. This was my week off. I am still nursing Sophia quite often, so havn't started my period yet. Usually you would stop the progesterone during your period, but I just have to make up my own schedule until they start back up. I started the progesterone again today, really hoping I start feeling normal again. I think I will ask my dr. if I can take the progesterone the entire month. My Mom does, she said she felt terrible when she would stop it as well. Of course, she is post menopausal, I don't think I can do the same.
Also, one of my closest friend is going through a very hard time right now. I don't feel free to talk about it for many reasons, but it is a heartbreaking situation and it is on my heart and mind most of the day. I know there is so much good in this world, but there are also people (especially children) who are suffering greatly. I am finding it very hard not to dwell on this lately. While it makes me appreciate how blessed and lucky my family is, it hurts me to know there is so much pain out there. I hate to say it, but I tend to think there is much more bad than good in our world, and I feel guilty for having such a wonderful life and still struggling sometimes.
Sorry this is so depressing, but I have spent most of my life trying to be fake happy through the bad times. While I don't think it is good to wallow in self pity, I think it is worse to deny the truth of what I am going through. Trying to find the balance and what is healthy is hard. Also, realizing the things that should be hard and make you sad. Suffering children should make me sad. An unusually dirty and messy house is temporary and shouldn't really bother me at all. Like
Autum said in
this post, that is just the evidence of a busy and happy life : )
Anyway, even though is wasn't my best week, there were many positive things. My friend
Jessica came yesterday and took 1 year pictures of Sophia. I can't wait to see them, Sophia was in a great mood, so there should be some good ones. We decided to do this on a whim, Jessica was downtown and called and asked if today was a good day. It really wasn't a good day, I had TONS of laundry and dishes and dirty floors that I should have been cleaning. But you know what, I am glad I said yes. Jessica is a positive person and can always bring me out of a funk. After she took Sophia's pictures, we went to our local yarn shop so I could help her pick out some yarn for
this hat. She knows how to knit, but hasn't done it in a while. Well, instead of running in there and just getting what we needed, we actually sat down and visited
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with the owner and other ladies who were knitting and I helped her start her project. Oh, I also bought some yarn for a scarf, like I don't have enough projects lol It was so nice and relaxing, we both said we need to do that more often. Yes, my house is still a wreck this morning, but I still don't regret my decision, the housework will get done....eventually.
We also got our schoolwork done early on Thursday so that we could go eat lunch at Cracker Barrel and go to the park with my Mom. I had to leave from the park to go and pick Sydney and Parker up from school so I missed the pictures of them feeding the ducks : (
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The big swings were in the full sun, so we all played on the baby swings. This is Samantha, the recipient of the most recent elephant. It took 3 of us to get her out of that swing LOL
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I also forgot to blog about Sydney's first Homecoming. I didn't get pictures of her by herself. So, here is a cropped picture of her. She went with two of her friends, no boy girl dates at 14. I got her dress at Ross, for only $15!!! Her shoes cost more than the dress lol Parker went too, but I didn't get any pictures of him : ( I had gone to Sydney's friend's house to do their makeup and didn't get back home in time to take pictures of Parker, he had already left. They go to a fairly small Christian private school, so there was no dancing : ( I really wish they would let them dance, I don't see the big deal. I mean we don't have to let them bump and grind, but there is clean dance music out there and dancing is so much fun! I think they had more fun at the bowling alley after the "banquet" than at the actual event. Oh well, I guess it is better than the anything goes that is typical of the dances at public schools. I just wish there could be some sort of inbetween.
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After having just proofread through this entire post, I realize it really wasn't a bad week after all. My house IS a mess, but it is because I spent the time with my family and friends. And the difficult moments were more than balanced out with the good ones! That is what I really love about blogging, it gives me a proper perspective on things. It doesn't take away the sad things that are still going on, but I can't let them affect everything. Or maybe my progesterone just kicked in LOLOL Who knows?!